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Say YES to YOU= NO to ABUSE!
India White • Dec 11, 2022
Say YES to YOU= NO to ABUSE!
Say YES to YOU = NO to ABUSE!- Dr. India White
So many times in life, it is tempting to desire to belong. We want to feel accepted. We’d like to be included in the next chapter of events. However, once we leave various functions, we feel like we’ve failed ourselves. Why? Well, we knew we would be mocked, or the laugh of the party. We’d be bullied by the same old individuals who act as if they were born GOD over us. Then, we endure the consequences throughout the week, ranging from being misunderstood, ripped off, and emotionally torn. WHY do we continue to put ourselves in harm’s way? It’s as if we hope that the same people who we know will hurt us will miraculously change and offer us that magical opportunity. Or, that person who never acknowledges your worth will some day make you see how much they value you. Come on now! When will this end? Answer: as soon as you say YES to you!
I have been honored to work with thousands of leaders from across the world. One thing never lies: how they make you feel and the accolades they give you in person and behind your back are one in the same. Sometimes, people will smile in your face while holding daggers of jealousy, malice, envy, greed, racism and more. You must learn to STOP
smiling in their face, and care enough about your self-worth, your family and your destiny to grow beyond their approval. Ask yourself, “What benefit has this truly served me, my business, or my family?” If you are struggling to find that answer, then let that struggle be your truth.
It's hard to swallow the truth that you’ve allowed yourself to be abused. Whether financially, emotionally, or spiritually, you believed in people who had no good intentions towards you. And yes, they got away with it….until judgment day. However, continue to focus on the good in life and learn to forgive and….LET GO! Fall OUT
of love with your abuser. STOP giving them front row access to your life. Even if you have to start over and unplug for a season from the fakery, do it. You were not destined to be someone else’s laughingstock, punching bag, or joke of the party. You have JUST AS MUCH value as they do! Now walk in it and refuse to go back to their shenanigans!
Here are some sure signs that you need to walk away and say YES to YOU:
1. They belittle you because of your race, upbringing or status in life
a. Some people have a way of trying to make you feel like you are worthless through their gaze, or comments they make about your appearance and more. They’ll give this gaze
as if they are looking down upon you like you are a peasant. They may comment about your outfit, your name, or your accolades in a way that says, “Oh well, you’re nothing so, whatever….lol!” You must learn how to not take this form of hatred personal. Some of these leaders have seen your worth, and they know what you have to offer. It’s interfered with how they felt about themselves. Unfortunately, it’s caused this type of a response. Go and be great beyond their gaze and the hatred that may come from them.
2. You ALWAYS get the short end of the stick
a. Unfortunately yes, it will always be the short end of the stick. And, it will dangle like a carrot over your head. This is a part of dealing with abuse. Did you think your abuser would have it any other way? Well, I’m here to tell you, this is part of the deal when working with individuals or establishing a relationship with someone who is NOT
for you or your well-being.
3. You feel like they are choking the life out of you
a. You will literally give the shirt off of your back for this individual or these people, because that is your nature. You love to pay it forward. Or, in a relationship, you are a Giver and they are the TAKER. Listen, when they do help you, you BETTER
pay them back or else they will remind you of how they helped you every waking second. They will place unrealistic demands on you, and won’t ever utter “Thank you”, because they are entitled to receive everything from you. In their eyes, they pretty much “own you”.
4. When you succeed, they go QUIET as if in mourning
a. Some people can like your posts if you are sick, mourning, or just lost your job. But, don’t open that business, write that book, or cross over into a promotion. It will turn them sick to their stomach because they are s till COMPARING themselves to you. You are their competition. They used you to step up…. never as a companion or a true friend or business partner. These people have ugly souls, and they are slowly rotting away because they refuse to get self-help and learn how to mature beyond basic emotions.
5. Every time you invest in them, you never benefit
a. Have you ever looked back and thought, “Well I’ve invested hundreds/thousands of dollars into this….where is my return on investment?” Guess what? It isn’t coming. Sorry to spit the truth, but sometimes you have to unplug because you will give your last into their traps. Unfortunately, many people never catch on it time, and end up on a roller coaster of chasing that wild dream, or getting caught up into various schemes. Choose to come out of empty promises, and move forward in your life.
6. When you give them your BEST, it is never good enough
a. Listen, as sad as this is, it is the truth. I’ve spent YEARS as a speaker, consultant, author, and after much success, there are still people in the market who deemed me as not good enough. These type of people will never promote you, offer you an opportunity, pay you what you are worth, or see your value. YOU ARE WASTING your time. It’s time for you to WAKE UP
and smell the coffee. Sometimes, you need to change your environment so you can LIVE and be celebrated and stop dealing with those who tolerate you.
Conclusion
Once you have decided that you want to truly live a quality life, take a moment to invest in yourself. Avoid those who belittle you because of your race. Refuse to do business if you’re always getting the short end of the stick. If they are choking the life out of you, choose to walk away. Find those who you can invest with and actually see the benefit. Find those who will celebrate your wins and will appreciate your best. Choose to put yourself first. It’s your time to win.
‼️So grateful for the opportunity to hear testimonials and reviews from a few rockstar educators about their takeaways and experiences from my Equitable math 🧮 practices session at MCTM in Minnesota this weekend🤩! It's inspiring to hear teachers who provide feedback and work to close the achievement gap. 🥰Let's continue learning from each other and making a difference in the lives of our students! #teacherappreciation #education #equitablemath #achievementgap #drindiawhite #teachers #tedx #equity Check out the session highlights here:
‼️Listen as a gritty Middle Eastern teacher explains how attending my Equity Keynote at the Math conference, helped her connect her experience as a BIPOC educator with her perspective on how to implement equitable practices for all students and relate to students of different cultures! #drindiawhite #tedx #equity #dei #math #education #teachers #students #bipoc #savvas #nctm #ncsm #bwxme #nabse #habse #uf
I urge you to take a moment to listen to Dr. India White's enlightening TEDx talk, "The Power of Grit," where she delves into what drives grit in the lives of leaders, teachers, and students every day. In this captivating presentation, Dr. White offers invaluable insights into the transformative potential of grit—the unwavering determination and resilience that propel individuals toward their goals, even in the face of adversity. As educators and leaders, we play a pivotal role in instilling and nurturing grit among our students and colleagues. Dr. White's talk serves as a powerful reminder of the impact we can have when we cultivate grit within ourselves and those we influence. I encourage you to watch the TEDx talk for a deeper understanding of how grit can drive success in our classrooms, workplaces, and lives.
I am beyond grateful and honored to have the opportunity to speak at UF's Alumni Gainesville reception and share the powerful message of grit with the new graduates from the University of Florida. As leaders, we have a unique platform and responsibility to inspire and empower the next generation as they embark on their journey beyond the university walls. Grit is more than just a buzzword; it is the unwavering determination and resilience that propel individuals toward their goals, even in the face of adversity. It's about facing challenges head-on, embracing failures as opportunities for growth, and never giving up on our dreams. Today, as we gather to celebrate the achievements of these remarkable graduates, let us remind them of the power they hold within themselves. Let us encourage them to cultivate grit in all aspects of their lives, knowing that with perseverance and determination, they can overcome any obstacle and achieve their wildest dreams. As leaders, let us lead by example, showing gratitude for the opportunities we've been given and inspiring others to do the same. Let us use our voices to uplift and encourage those around us, knowing that together, we can create a brighter and more resilient future for all. Congratulations to the graduates of the University of Florida! May your journey be filled with grit, determination, and endless possibilities.
I am beyond grateful and honored to have the opportunity to speak at UF's Young Alumni reception and share the powerful message of grit with the new graduates from the University of Florida. As leaders, we have a unique platform and responsibility to inspire and empower the next generation as they embark on their journey beyond the university walls. Grit is more than just a buzzword; it is the unwavering determination and resilience that propel individuals toward their goals, even in the face of adversity. It's about facing challenges head-on, embracing failures as opportunities for growth, and never giving up on our dreams. Today, as we gather to celebrate the achievements of these remarkable graduates, let us remind them of the power they hold within themselves. Let us encourage them to cultivate grit in all aspects of their lives, knowing that with perseverance and determination, they can overcome any obstacle and achieve their wildest dreams. As leaders, let us lead by example, showing gratitude for the opportunities we've been given and inspiring others to do the same. Let us use our voices to uplift and encourage those around us, knowing that together, we can create a brighter and more resilient future for all. Congratulations to the graduates of the University of Florida! May your journey be filled with grit, determination, and endless possibilities.
Join us on the Grit and Equity Talks Podcast with Dr. India White, where we will discuss spaced vs. mass practice for teachers! Visit www.india-white.com for more information #drindiawhite #grit #equity
🥳As the opening keynote at the WMC Annual conference, I had the opportunity to discuss equitable math practices with teachers. I am grateful to have gifted 30 copies of the Equity Counts book collaboration after my session! 🤩Thanks to Savvas Learning Company for making this happen🥰. The best is yet to come for Wisconsin teachers and students! #EquitableMath #Education #EquityCounts #savvas #drindiawhite #tedx #equity #WisconsinTeachers #StudentSuccess #wismath24 #nctm #ncsm… See more — at On Green Lake in Wisconsin.
Hanging out wit the tribe! I had the honor of being the opening keynote speaker at @WisMathCouncil 🤩 We applied the concept of grit in their classroom! Thanks to @SavvasLearning!! #drindiawhite #math #grit #student #teachers @wismathcouncil #wismath24 #SAVVAS #nctm #ncsm #bwxme
This morning, I had the honor of being the opening keynote speaker at WMC's Annual Math Conference. 🤩The conference was a great success, with attendees discussing the importance of grit in both teachers and students. I’m excited to see Wisconsin teachers apply the concept of grit in their classrooms and help their students develop this crucial! Thanks to Savvas Learning Company for the support and encouragement!! #drindiawhite #math #grit #student #teachers @wismathcouncil #wismath24 #SAVVAS #nctm #ncsm #bwxme
‼️Attention all Wisconsin teachers! Are you ready to enhance your teaching skills and help your students develop their grit😃? If so, don't miss out on the opportunity to purchase my Grit Workbook at a discounted price! 🤗I have 50 copies available at WMC, so come and grab your copy this week🤩! #wismath2024 #nctm #ncsm #drindiawhite #grit #education #students #teachers #wismath2024 #nctm #ncsm #drindiawhite #grit #education #students #teachers